October 2011
24 posts
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Guy at Karaoke Night Performing 'Hill Street...
I know what you’re thinking: “I didn’t know that theme had any words.”
It doesn’t. He just stands up there and vamps for three minutes. He wins the contest every week. That’s how good he is.
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I made these Big Lebowski/Minnesota Twins jokes...
A tight-lipped Theo Epstein drops Carlos Marmol in The Dude Bill Smith’s bath. “Nice Marmol,” he says & trades every prospect with a 400+ OBP. 11 hours ago via TweetDeck
“All The Dude wanted… was some closers….” - Bill Smith getting knocked out of playoff contention. 10 hours ago via TweetDeck
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My favorite part of 'Hunt for Red October' is the...
(Inside the Boston front office…)
SEAMAN JONES: Club, owner! Crazy Asshole!
CHERINGTON: What’s goin’ on?
SEAMAN JONES: Larry Lucchino sometimes stops suddenly to see if his employees are behind him. We call it, “Crazy Asshole.” The only thing you can do is go dead. Shut your mouth down and make like a hole in the conversation.
CHERINGTON: So what’s the...
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Really Cool Things About Mark Sanchez
(Note: this list may or may not have been written by a girl Mark Sanchez met on Omegle.com.)
1. He has his own van.
2. He can shave.
3. He doesn’t have a curfew.
4. Something about football or something, I was kinda drunk.
5. He has ID.
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Comprehensive List of Funny Stand-Up Specials...
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The New York Rangers Ask Beachfront Homeowners to...
Bright lights can confuse John Tortorella’s offspring.
Once a year, John Tortorella lays anywhere from 50-200 eggs on the beach, brushing sand over them with his powerful flippers. The sun then heats the sand, incubating the eggs. When the time is right, baby Tortorellas hatch and make their way to the sea.
However, each baby Tortorella uses the light of the moon reflecting on the water...
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Ways to Improve Tim Allen's Appearance on Any...
5. Have him stand by a fence and berate “Wilson” for having no idea what he’s talking about, then the camera travels over the fence and reveals Ralph Wilson, standing in mute, shaken dignity, a solitary tear finally falling off the tip of a fluttered eyelid.
4. All three of his TV sons stand behind him looking quiet and bloated and weird—like you could take them to any strip...
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Netflix User Review of 'Atlas Shrugged, Part I' #2
★★★★★
We saw this movie today, and thought it was terrific. the stars were not real famous, but everything about the movie was very, very entertaining. I just dont understand why they say part 1. Is there going to be a part 2. I never read the book, unfortunately, but will do so. Is there going to be a sequel or part 2. If anybody knows, please e-mail me at twinkeys2@yahoo.com.
14 out of 14...
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Just gonna grab my Guy Fawkes mask and head out to...
Yep, nothing says peaceably trying to take the reins of power back from a captive moneyed-interest government and restoring it to the people like clownishly dressing as a murderer who tried to explode the entire fucking parliament building and the king to bring a cabal of wealthy Catholic peers to power and let them fleece the government by handing out favors and dispensations.
Ahahahaha...
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As part of my zero-carb diet, I've stuffed this...
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alexis-cool:
barack obama has publicly stated that he believes angels have NO effect on the outcome of our call of duty black ops matches
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Lady Chatterley's Lover's Rad Car
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The Atlanta Falcons' stadium is so dehumanizingly...
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Hello, I edit 'Grantland.' I will offer you a...
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Had a disturbingly real dream where I played 'she...
Even odder was that I did it to get him to stop tormenting a girl I met at a journalism conference on the day Kurt Cobain died and haven’t seen since.
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Yet More Song Lyrics That Will Get You Kicked out...
Cupid, take off her clothes
And let anything go
Into my lover’s butt, from me
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I like to think that Captain Steubing and George...
— Stand-up comedy intro track on a nerdcore album.
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Please join me in supporting Pauly Shore's...
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BREAKING: Cubs Talk to Red Sox GM Theo Epstein
I can see this playing out 5 ways, all of which will come true:
1. Epstein moves to Chicago, taking the Cubs to their first series victory since 1908, breaking the Curse of the Bambino, the Curse of the Billy Goat, and becoming the greatest general manager since Branch Rickey, Omar Minaya or Brian Sabean.
2. The Red Sox repeat their post-2002 offer to Billy Beane, who gets the band back together...
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