May 2012
13 posts
4 tags
'Tales... from the Hospital!' Part 1
A woman orderly with questionable dentition just spent a full five minutes telling me about a bell on an otherwise totally bare wall in the maternity ward that new mothers—and only new mothers—are allowed to ring, after childbirth, to trigger a pre-recorded chime that plays throughout the hospital.
She described this bell as “the highest honor” and “the highest honor someone...
3 tags
It's Fun When People Announce They're Launching...
Leaving aside how George R.R. Martin is a creepy weirdo who writes with obsessive detail about child rape and breast mutilation, you’re gonna spend days of your life reading a series from a 64-year-old obese gnome who took nearly seven years to write the last book and abandons the project to write whole other books entirely.
Now, obviously, a lot of entertainment is a fun waste of...
3 tags
Mitt Romney to India: 'Eh-Neeek-Chock!'
(AP) NEW DELHI - Mitt Romney’s attempts to fill the nation of India with giant Apaches who would be “Super Friends” to America failed today when he didn’t understand that they were the wrong kind of Indians.
The incident recalls Romney’s March gaffe, when he screamed “Eh-neeek-chock!” at a flightline full of AH-64D Apache Longbows, in an attempt to...
3 tags
I've finally figured out what bothers me about...
Apart from the neat handle thing on the top,
its shape is essentially the US Open Tennis trophy.
Or any trophy cup.
somebody somewhere is doing a thing you don't... →
hungryghoast:
This was originally by @AGentleBrees but I’m thankful it was RT’d by @myacehen:
A ghost town, lone feature in a barren expanse. A crow alights on a dead tree, opening its beak: to you, traveler, it explains
1st Gender: TREE-LASS. Lumbering dancer made of timber:…
4 tags
It's Monday, which means it's time for Nelle...
Or, for regular followers of this feature, “A collection of the worst sentences anyone will be paid for writing this week.” *********
Roger’s double-talk extends to that “Semitic wife” of his who Bert’s unaware has already been circumcised from Roger’s marital staff,
Unfortunately, this maturity isn’t duplicated at the office, where he competes with the far younger Ginsberg to...
2 tags
OK, just THINK: 'If I were a beer, where would I...
1 tag
Kurt Angle's Top Five Places to Live in New Jersey
5. Teaneck
4. Colts Neck
3. Brokenfreakin Neck
2. East Drugs
1. Nutley
[insert witty title here]: A Few Words About Adam... →
dangerguerrero:
When I was 16, I bought a terrible car. Even at an age when I had little to no experience as a driver, that was abundantly clear. It looked like hell — from the terrible color and design to the terrible dents and scratches I put into the body through a mix of inexperience and bravado — and,…
3 tags
Thanks, Salon! or, 'Here Are Some of the Worst...
All of these are from Salon’s routinely shitty Mad Men recapper:
“Not just the hand that fed the agency, but the hand that holds the cigarette we might assume, as SCDP’s former lucky strike turns into a match that could burn down the house.”
“Stan grumps that her opinion shouldn’t count more just because she’s a “boob-carrying consumer” (as opposed to a consuming boob...
